What Now

Patience.

Peace.

Joy

I’m needing these three things.

In the in-between – again.

I have to remind myself that this is the life we’ve chosen and while the gypsy life can be hard at times, it’s adventurous, it’s unnerving but at the same time, it’s wonderful.

We’ve flown over sea, driven over mountains, made wonderful new friends and bonded deeply with family, that for such a long time, have been separated by distance. We’ve had so much fun seeking out the next place to visit albeit on travelers’ shoestring. We’ve found cute little cafes in the middle of no-where.

Bathed in hot pools and swam in ice-cold rivers. Surfed oceans where waters rush in over big grey cobblestones, quickly lifting feet so they don’t hurt in the rush. We’ve listened to the beautiful sound of the Tooey as it sings its song each morning and camped with visiting family and friends on a cliff high above the sea, watching the gentle ripple of misty blue waves rolling in while a warm fire burned beside us.

What’s not to love about all that?

But now?

We’ve chosen to always put our days in the hands of our creator and so we wait knowing he has the next step carefully mapped out. We don’t know exactly how it will play out but we’ve taken the first step…I said yes to a job in the city when ideally, we really wanted to be in the country but it was meant to be … and I remember ‘just take the first step’

Then the second… tickets booked and the men’s will soon return.

The rest will unfold.

One foot in front of the other.

This is our life right now – a dear friend called it “Zany” and well, I think she may be right!

The Next Step

Sometimes it’s hard to see what lays ahead and all one can do is take the next step.

For me, this is an uncomfortable space. I want to know it all. I want to have it all mapped out and yet as much as I endeavour to do this, I know that certain things about our future can’t be framed, not right now. Once again our life sits gently in the hands of the creator as we wait for it all to unfold.

Sure, we have some ideas of what it may look like, even plans, but in choosing to live a gypsy kind of lifestyle, the unexpected is inevitable.

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Photo by Renato Abati on Pexels.com

When I started to write this post, it would still be a few days until I set out for the airport and another adventure.

Perth, and suddenly I’m back, sweltering in the West Australian summer heat again.

photo of white ceramic mug with coffee next to silver dollar gum tree leaves on white bed sheet

Photo by Madison Inouye on Pexels.com

I’m happy to be in back my homeland. The smell of the gum trees after a summer rain but I’ve left part of my heart in New Zealand, my men, more family, difficult. I’ve laid down roots in the land of the long white cloud and so the parting, tho joyful, was mixed with other emotions.

I’m home now, feeling somewhat displaced. Knowing all my goods are lying idle in a shed not far from where I sleep. Am I staying, am I going?

The unknown.

BUT oh how wonderful to be with family, my children, grandchildren, my mama, my brother, nephews and nieces too. Christmas time. Birthdays too and soon to see my travelling sister.

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Photo by fauxels on Pexels.com

Tis the season to be jolly and jolly I will be. I’m heading South soon to be with all my own for the festive merriment. Happy Days. Crazy Days.

No matter what your season is right now, I’m hoping you can embrace it and have the most joyous of times too.

Thanking Jesus for all he has done and is yet to do but for now I’m just taking the next step.

 

Take Time

Yesterday we set off again for another Kiwi Adventure.

Our little gap year has been all about making space to catch our breath, taking time to smell the roses so to speak. Lately tho, we’ve had a few unseen pressures and we’ve both been a little tired and a tad stressed.

Perhaps having one car, borrowed at that and needing to travel in three different directions, morning and evening, adds to the sense of pressure, however, this is the kind of compromise one encounters when one has chosen to live small, so it’s ok.

We know how important it is to make time for each other and so, this weekend we set off for another meander through this beautiful country.

Up early, bags and bathers in hand and we were out the door long before the teenager had opened his eyes! Hubby had heard about a watering hole on the river near where he’d been working the past week or so. “How about we head out that way,” he offered, it was like a dangling carrot to get us through the week and I was keen as mustard.

We chose to drive past the turnoff that led to the river and instead, head for TIKOKINO Sadly, Tokikino turned out to be a sleepy little town, on its last legs, however, it did have some cute vintage houses with lots of potential and a Pub / Cafe, but that didn’t open till 11am and we were hungry so after a two minute loop of the town, we drove onward and came upon ONGAONGA.

What a lovely surprise it was, small and quiet, but lovely just the same. What was especially lovely was to discover the heartbeat of the little cafe convenience store. We sat out the front at the green iron-framed setting and waited for our much-needed breakfast.

It was great spot to watch the farmers drive up in their mega machines and casually parked across the street. Truckers stopped in for a bite to eat breaking up their journey, while young blokes, sporting red bands gumboots, drove their utes almost to the front door, up close to the petrol bowser near where we sat. The window wound down their window so they could yell out hello. 

This is Mathew Ascott from Scott Ag.

We watched as the owner ran out of the shop, leant into one passenger’s window for a quick hello, grab his EFTPOS card and return with a pie and drink. It seemed everyone here knew each other but we didn’t feel on the outskirt. They even stopped to chat with us.

If you get a chance to call into ONGA ONGA don’t forget to check out the historic townsite and drop a coin in the Restoration Box across the road from the Cafe and then walk down and check out the historic buildings on the edge of town.

Our enjoyable brunch was followed by a trek back toward Maraekakaho to find the river hole we’d been told about. After crossing a number of OneWay bridges at the last one we saw a gate on the side just before the bridge (see in the pic above) and made our way down to the river to cool off. Delightful.

Breathtakingly cool but well worth it. I only wish I had swimming booties as walking over the river stones is a bit tricky and somewhat painful in bare feet.

You’d think that was enough of an adventure, but no, we thought we’d have one last refreshment stop on our way home. “Filly and Chook” is a bar/cafe and too it’s credit does have a lovely outdoor seating area under pretty trees, so much potential. It caught our eye on the way out to Tokokino. I’d like to say it was a worthwhile stop, but neither of us was very impressed. It wasn’t the building or the surroundings so much, but rather the ‘atmosphere’. It just didn’t seem to fit the country surrounds and seriously lacked warmth – perhaps the grumpy owner didn’t help matters.

It felt like the buildings were just plonked on the edge of a property to make money and had no heartbeat. Needless to say, we won’t be going back in a hurry. To be fair, there is hope because the property is for sale. Perhaps someone will come in and breath in the life it needs.

If you didn’t get out this weekend, I hope you at least enjoyed reading about our little venture. #karafamadventure

The Winding Road

Below is a post I wrote back in 2014.  I’m sharing again because sometimes looking back can be profound. What a journey we’ve had since that day.

Busselton to Perth – Hospitals – Life-Threatening Verdicts – Operations – Hope Rising – Perth to New Zealand – New Horizons – New Culture – New Friends – New Zealand. New Zealand to Perth. Adventure all the way. Not always easy but well worth the ride.

No idea of the future but just enjoying the ride.

So if your feeling like it’s time for a change – go for it. Take the adventure, you won’t regret it. Change is so wonderful. Yes, you’ll be stretched but you’ll also grow, perhaps exponentially, and remember wherever you go, you’ll always be a blessing when you carry our creator with you.

THE WINDING ROAD

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Life can take some twists and turns. Looking back there have been a few twists that I never saw coming. Like last year when our life changed for what appears to be forever. Events can alter your seemingly unchangeable existence. Just when you get comfortable and accept the status quo…bang…the one in charge of it all suddenly decides to hand you a new map and you have to make the decision of whether to take a risk and follow into the unknown, or resist the offer and try to stay safe with what you know.

Choosing to stay safe could risk stagnation. I don’t think for a minute this map is ‘a new map’ I believe the pages were written from the beginning, we just never knew that this would be where it would take us.

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Photo by Josh Sorenson from Pexels

“Suddenly” can sneak up at any moment, overruling our quiet predictable lives.

Although headed for the same destination, the route is about to make a change. I have a feeling we’re in for the ride of our life and I’m excited!

I’ve said yes to the challenge so until we get to the bend in the road, I’m holding on to what I know and keeping my eyes on the Son ….just like in this picture, He is lighting the way. I can’t see around the bend yet, but I know something is waiting there.

In awe at the smallness of mankind and the greatness of the one who loves us!

This is my Story

THIS IS MY STROY THIS IS MY SONG

“My earliest memory is of the boy down the road throwing a cricket wicket through our lounge room window. It was my birthday. I don’t know why to this day that he did that. Maybe he wanted to come to my party. Maybe it was just an accident. I don’t know – but I do remember seeing broken glass everywhere and being scared, really scared and feeling like it was it all my fault.  I hadn’t done anything wrong but I was afraid.  My little friends and I nestled tightly around my party table that sat by the window. While mum cleaned up the broken glass I pretended I was ok. But it wasn’t ok and I quietly worried about how I could fix that window.

Looking back now, I realise it wasn’t just the window that needed fixing.  There were far bigger things to be worried about. Fortunately, I was young and carefree and somewhat oblivious to all that was going on in our little world.

I have mixed memories from those early days. Some happy memories but many clouded with fear. I was only six at the time and things were tumultuous to say the least. My dad was sick. Mental illness had plagued him since his early twenties and was it getting worse as each month passed by. He had been diagnosed with both Manic Depression and Schizophrenia and we were all trying to come to terms with the erratic lifestyle of living with someone with a mental illness. As life went on and I grew older I wrote songs that helped process that journey.”

THIS IS MY STORY THIS IS MY SONG is something I’ve dreamed about for a long time.  As a young girl, I loved singing Grandma’s favourite hymn ‘This is my Story’. When she died we were all so sad but a little seed was planted in my heart that one day her legacy could live on as I shared our story in song and tell how through all the years, “His Story” was woven completely and perfectly into our story.

Below are the words to the song I wrote about life with my father who through God’s amazing love, despite his brokenness, was also carried safely home into the loving arms of Grace.


AS A LITTLE GIRL          (Recording Coming Soon)

As a little girl I’d sit upon my daddy’s knee 

Listen to the preacher

Knew that he was talking to me

Saying, “Jesus loves you and He wants you to follow Him

Just a little girl but I knew that I would follow Him

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Now people might say that our house was not a place for a child

See, daddy was a gambling man and he suffered from a troubled mind

But mama, she was praying and taught me of my Father above

I was just a little girl, sheltered in the Father’s love

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I remember the day when daddy he had to leave

I didn’t understand it then but now I know my mama did it for me

Shattered dreams for a child that was so young

Just a little girl and my life had only just begun

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If you’re looking for the answers to the questions in your mind

Gotta reach out to the Father, He’ll help you leave the past behind

Never said it would be easy, never said it wouldn’t hurt

But you know He’s never left me, He’s loved me through the hurt

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A New Day – Reset

Somedays you wake up and you know something has changed.

Today was one of those of those days and just like a light turning on in a dark room, I realised a door was about to close and another would soon open. Since leaving Australia some months ago, the journey has been an interesting one, in that every time I approached my blog page with the intention to write, no words would come and yet I had so much to write about. My heart was full, is full, with adventure and discovery, a new land and stories. Stories I want to share, but no. I just could not.

Today tho, it became clear. I saw a door opened for me – to close. Now, that may sound strange. I’m showing up here to say goodbye, farewell and on the other hand – ‘hello’!    I’ll still show up here, now and then, but i’m officially moving

closing a door – opening a door

out with the old – in with the new

I guess you could call it a RESET

You may have heard me speak about this thing I’ve had brewing behind the scenes. A story, A song, A picture I’ve had for so long – I’ve not known how to unpack it nor have I had the confidence to do so. Today something changed.

Let me explain.

Today, my fellow dreamer (hubby) and I drove off to see a little more of this land that lies under the long white cloud and I began to say out loud “I think it’s time to leave my blog and head over to my new one,”

“what new one?”

The one I’ve been working on and hiding for too long – it’s called…

this is my story, this is my song

It’s been sitting, bubbling, brewing, building, waiting patiently for the right time and at the same time I’ve been writing writing writing – trying to get all these words, our story onto paper, into a book. For some reason, I just knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt that the time was right to press the RESET button. I’ve still work to do and my perfectionistic nature wants to over ride ‘creative faith’ by whispering ‘NO not yet’, but I’ve heard

“when the noise of what you want to do becomes louder than what your doing then it’s time to move”

So baby steps will do – time to step out into the unknown. It scares me no end but I’m compelled to move and tho there be no end of excuses I could find to talk my self out of it

If I am to live me best life,

I need to move …. I MUST MOVE

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It was not surprise then, that today’s road led us to something new, something significant. The sun was shining brightly, unlike yesterday, when everything was grey and uncertain, including me.  But today, as we drove down ‘State Highway 2’ looking for a new cafe, I babbled on to fellow dreamer about the noise that was humming in my head.  Fellow dreamer, also filled with with similar stirrings, babbled back and together we were one happy ‘babble’ of hope and excitement until we eventually arrived.

We found our Cafe in the little town of Pukehou not to far from the little town of Otane. We stayed there, young honeymooners, many moons ago.

Cottage Cafe – Seemingly Insignificant – Truly Enlightening

Earthy, organic and emanating warmth, it seemed to make our babble keep bubbling. It was as if we’d found a treasure or at least a sign. Something about this place seemed to be speaking to us and in time I may share that story. It was not by chance that we were here. As we sat at moss covered tables, warmed within by homemade fare and warmed without by golden sunlight, I sensed this place would be part of the new and a place we’d be coming back to.

Light bulb moments, connections and confirmations were going off like fire crackers and making something come alive in both of us. I love this.

So soon, very soon you’ll find me somewhere new

It’s an exciting journey waiting to unfold with stories waiting to be told.

I do hope you’ll join me.

Farewell my cottagedreams, I’m laying you to rest – at least for a season, trading you for something ‘new’ and in some way, although I’m sad to go, I think I may be trading my sorrows for joy.

 

October and the little steps

If you had told me five years ago that I’d be doing what I’m doing today, I wouldn’t have believed you.

(photo credit Peta Stenhouse)

Some moons ago, when we left our safe home, I was thrust into a whole new world. I quickly found myself needing to be the bread winner as my man fought for his life. I slipped into the  9-5 but still dreamed of doing something a little more creative than selling drugs over the pharmacy counter. It just wasn’t cutting it but I had no choice but to soldier on.

Until one day, when a door unexpectedly opened and I became a part owner of a business called The Long Table Perth

I can’t believe how quickly our business grew and at the same time, I did too. I was stretched and when I thought I’d been stretched enough, I was stretched even more. We became a great team, my partner and I. We both stand amazed at the favour we have been given.

I’m not saying it was an easy ride. Anyone working in the food industry will know that “easy it is not!” After the honey moon days I began to wonder why on earth I was doing this? This wan’t quite what I had in mind…but then again, nothing in this life had been, so why was I surprised? I questioned…why am I doing this, what’s the point? I’m tired, stressed and this was not on my radar?

photo credit Peta Stenhouse

I felt a still small voice say “You don’t need to know why, just go with it.”

Have you ever been in  a position like that?

It’s a little unerving. You feel unsure as you take faith steps, one by one.

It was like this for me. Then, almost suddenly, I could see a purpose in all this Long Table goodness.

I sensed a repositioning for purpose and at the same time knew the Master Builder was growing my capacity. Somedays I felt totally inadequate, out of my league but over time my confidence gained strength. I began to believe in me (thanks also to my business partner (pictured below), you have been an integral part of that)

photo credit Laura Hurley

So we come to October. Spring season for events and its been crazy. Crazy good, but crazy busy. I’ve been running back to back events, managing staff, handling admin and prepping food and while my business buddy is taking a well deserved rest I’ve run from pillar to post running this business of ours. It’s not ideal but what I have learned is that I’m strong, I’m capable and I’ve got what lit takes to do this.

October has been a blessing and I’m grateful for the opportunity to see what the Master Builder has been up to and as I prepare to leave my loved Long Table in capable hands, I know I have been well equipped for my next season in Aetoeroa.

Take courage, take those faith steps. You never know where they may lead you.

Seasons Change

Today I’m lying on my bed when I’d much rather be out in the beautiful Spring sunshine soaking up it’s warmth, admiring it’s beauty or maybe pottering in the spring garden but sadly my body is unwell and demanding rest.

The up side is I’ve time to ponder, so ponder I do. It’s finally apparent that the season has changed and there’s no doubting ‘spring is here’. I can hear the birds singing alongside the hum of neighbours chattering on their decks nearby.

Little buds and occasional flowers have suddenly appeared on stark branches displaying a beautiful contrast and the miracle of new life.

The thing is, just weeks ago one would have thought those branches were dead and nothing good would come of them but we knew to wait, not touch the old lifeless limbs and suddenly beauty has sprung forth all in its own sweet time.

So my pondering takes me to us, maybe to you, to the seasons we can go through.

In all honesty I think most of us are uncomfortable with the ugly, deathly, dormant stages of our lives and perhaps even with the lives of those close to us. We want movement. We want change and resist the waiting, thinking this place is too ugly, not good enough and worry that good things are passing us by.

Not willing to just let seasons come and go, we tend to get in the way of ‘process’. The very process thats fashioned, yes fashioned, to bring about something more beautiful than if we’d forced the change.

Let’s not, in our eagerness to speed things up, create unnecessary ‘around the mountain’ experiences.

Today, as you go about your life, I hope you can find some joy in the place you find your self in, even if it seems like you’ve been there been forever. Something is happening within your seemingly dead branch. Know that this lifeless place is written in the DNA of the original plan and the road you walk is leading you to a better and brighter you.

Heading South

Stolen moments and little getaways are so important. Family is important.

So couple of weeks ago we set on a weekend adventure to visit our bigger three.

First a flying trip down into what we call “exile” where offspring number four resides with her man and two little ones. Jumping in the car, hubby puts on his laid back vibes and we’re off  driving deep into the South.

 

Breathing in the cool forest air, playing with little ones amongst the trees and listening to the sound of birds singing makes us come alive. Creative souls inspired.

Our hearts fill with delight and we’re just a little sad we don’t get to do this often enough.

Cares of our city life can dampen our adventuring spirit – too quickly we find ourselves tired on a conveyer belt of life thats hard to stop.

When we do rewards are invaluable.

 

 

 

Creativity comes alive.

 

Time to breath.

 

Time to ponder.

 

Time to connect.

 

And precious memories are made.

Little hands Little feet.

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Experiencing the unexpected like Tulips in bloom.

 

 

 

We stay a night,  leaving early and set off  to visit offspring five and three not so far away.

 

 

 

 

 

Our first stop COFFEE

Sitting in Merchant n Maker watching our big boy do his thing.

He’s seamless in his ability to embrace the crowd and pump out copious amounts of coffee. We’re proud of his venture at Maker Espresso – roasting his own coffee.

 Order Great Coffee Here Sunday morning on the beach where papa bear, although sad not to be surfing with them anymore, was more than happy to photgraph them at his favourite old spots.SONY DSC

IMG_6628A final celebration that left us tummy and heart full knowing our next visit would be to see the soon expected arrival of grand bubba number three.IMG_6547  Time out to make memories with our little family in the South.