THIS IS MY STROY THIS IS MY SONG – full post can be viewed on my other blog
My earliest memory is of the boy down the road throwing a cricket wicket through our lounge room window. It was my birthday. I don’t know why to this day that he did that. Maybe he wanted to come to my party. Maybe it was just an accident. I don’t know – but I do remember seeing broken glass everywhere and being scared, really scared and feeling like it was it my fault. I hadn’t done anything wrong but I was worried. I sat there with my little friends at our party table by the window, trying to pretend I was ok, But it wasn’t ok and I quietly worried about how I could fix that window.
Looking back now, I realise it wasn’t just the window that needed fixing. There were far bigger things to be worried about. Fortunately, I was young and carefree and somewhat oblivious to all that was going on in our little world.
I have mixed memories from those early days. Some happy memories but many clouded with fear. I was only six at the time and things were tumultuous to say the least. My dad was sick. Mental illness had plagued him since his early twenties and was it getting worse as each month passed by. He had been diagnosed with both Manic Depression and Schizophrenia and we were all trying to come to terms with the erratic lifestyle of living with someone with a mental illness.
THIS IS MY STORY THIS IS MY SONG is something I’ve dreamed about for a long time. As a young girl, I loved singing Grandma’s favourite hymn ‘This is my Story’. When she died we were all so sad but a little seed was planted in my heart that one day her legacy could live on as I shared our story in song and tell how through all the years, “His Story” was woven completely and perfectly into our story.
Below are the words to the song I wrote about life with my father who through God’s amazing love, despite his brokenness, was also carried safely home into the loving arms of Grace.
AS A LITTLE GIRL (Recording Coming Soon)
As a little girl I’d sit upon my daddy’s knee
Listen to the preacher
Knew that he was talking to me
Saying, “Jesus loves you and He wants you to follow Him
Just a little girl but I knew that I would follow Him
Now people might say that our house was not a place for a child
See, daddy was a gambling man and he suffered from a troubled mind
But mama, she was praying and taught me of my Father above
I was just a little girl, sheltered in the Father’s love
I remember the day when daddy he had to leave
I didn’t understand it then but now I know my mama did it for me
Shattered dreams for a child that was so young
Just a little girl and my life had only just begun
If you’re looking for the answers to the questions in your mind
Gotta reach out to the Father, He’ll help you leave the past behind
Never said it would be easy, never said it wouldn’t hurt
But you know He’s never left me, He’s loved me through the hurt