It’s almost a whole month since I wrote about ‘self-care’. I’m happy to say that last weekend I took my own advice and went away for a little jaunt in the country.
At first, I thought it would be be too difficult to get away. My men had just returned home after being down south for almost three weeks, and even though I thoroughly enjoyed ‘me time’, I did miss them, leaving them so soon wasn’t ideal.
That’s the thing about self care.
Sometimes, it’s inconvenient.
Now, no-one could be blamed for thinking “hasn’t she just had more than two weeks alone – wasn’t that enough to fill her tank?”
To be honest, my body was very rested, but there was something not at rest within. I needed some time to reconcile and re-ignite one thing that had be nagging me.
It was the book – the one I was supposed to finish last year. I didn’t. Then there were some other complications that had me stuck. Really stuck where that was concerned. I needed a kick start and what better than a writing retreat in the country and better still, at a Benedictine Monastery?
“Goodbye Boys, I’ve gotta go do this.” and off I went.
I’m so, so glad I did.
Weeks earlier I’d set myself a goal.
‘At the retreat, I could and would, begin again. I would let go of what ‘lost motivation’ was doing to me. I would also let go of all the doubts that had become a constant nagging, telling me I was just a dreamer. I would simply start again, somewhere – anywhere.’
Setting that goal was pivotal.
The good book talks about fanning into fan the gift that we’ve been given. All too often we let who we really are get drowned out by the cares and weight of the world and more so, by the sound of your own self critic.
You’ve been made for purpose and by design. Remember that.
Perhaps you need a little self care this weekend to find yourself again, to revisit you, maybe just something you’ve let go.
I’m reminded of the lines in Rita Springer’s song, Defender.
“When I thought I’d lost me, you knew where I’d left me, you reintroduced me to your love. You picked all the pieces, put me back together – you are the defender of my heart.”
Go find what it is you’re meant to do. Be kind to yourself in the searching.
You won’t regret it.